Mary Kitzmiller Horse Training Q & A, by Farnam for April 2, 2026 - Horses in the Morning

In this episode of Horses in the Morning, host Coach Jen and guest Mary Kitzmiller dive deep into horse training principles centered around the foundational concept of 'getting control of the horse's feet'—not just physically, but emotionally and mentally. Mary shares her personal epiphany that true control comes not from forcing movement, but from helping the horse regulate its own emotions through calm, consistent, and deliberate groundwork. She emphasizes that a horse’s reactive behavior—whether crowding, kicking, or refusing to stand still—often stems from the handler’s own unregulated energy. Using real-life examples from clinics and training sessions, Mary demonstrates how subtle cues, such as guiding a horse to paw with one foot then the other, can calm a nervous horse without physical exertion. The episode also features listener Q&A on common behavioral issues: a Morgan who crowds, a mare who kicks defensively, and a mare who kicks at feeding time due to resource guarding. Mary offers practical, humane solutions rooted in emotional regulation, boundary-setting, and environmental management, stressing the importance of releasing pressure when the horse complies. She advocates for patience, consistency, and using the horse’s body parts (especially shoulders and hindquarters) as tools for control and communication. The episode closes with Mary’s invitation to connect via Facebook and Shopify for her horsemanship content and artwork. Key takeaways include: 1) Control of the feet is not about dominance but emotional regulation; 2) Horses mirror their handler’s energy—calmness is contagious; 3) Use subtle, non-punitive cues to guide behavior; 4) Reinforce calmness with release, not punishment; 5) Address behavioral issues by changing the environment and routine, not just the horse’s actions; 6) Practice mounting and dismounting as a training exercise, not a rushed ritual; 7) A horse’s 'safe space' is earned through consistent, patient training; 8) The trainer’s emotional maturity is the most important tool in the saddle.