Feature interview: How to create the love we all want to feel

In this insightful interview, Dr. Sonja Lubomirsky, a world-renowned happiness researcher with over three decades of experience, discusses her new book, *How to Feel Loved: The Five Mindsets That Get You More of What Matters Most*. She argues that the key to lasting happiness isn't external achievements or status, but the internal experience of feeling loved—especially through deep, authentic connection. Drawing on extensive research and clinical trials, Lubomirsky reveals that the most effective way to feel loved is not to change yourself or demand love from others, but to first make others feel loved through curiosity, active listening, and vulnerability. She introduces powerful metaphors like the 'underwater seesaw' to illustrate how mutual openness builds intimacy, and emphasizes that love is not something we receive passively, but something we co-create through intentional, empathetic conversation. The episode also explores how loneliness, social media, and the illusion of knowing someone well can block connection, and offers practical mindsets—curiosity, multiplicity, and presence—to rebuild and deepen relationships across all areas of life.