929. - Chris & Jason
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In this candid and chaotic episode of How Long Gone, Chris and Jason dive into a wide array of topics with their signature blend of humor, cynicism, and cultural critique. They open with a meta-commentary on guest cancellations and the emotional toll of podcasting, before launching into a scathing take on The Strokes' new album—framing it as a financial reckoning, likening it to child support or alimony. The conversation meanders through absurd comparisons, from Nav’s green room to the fictional 'Voids' band, and explores the commodification of identity through Coachella stickers and festival culture. They critique the state of modern entertainment, questioning the relevance of Lorne Michaels documentaries and the dilution of prestige in events like the Masters golf tournament, now overrun by influencers. The hosts also tackle personal obsessions—upgrading their TVs, sound systems, and the absurdity of 'incel-y' sound bars—before turning to food, with a vivid account of a $50 flat omelet at the Four Seasons. A heated debate erupts over dogs in public spaces, culminating in a call for stricter service animal enforcement. The episode closes with reflections on space exploration, questioning its value in a world facing real crises, while also celebrating the absurdity of human progress. Throughout, the dynamic duo maintains their trademark irreverence, blending satire with genuine cultural observation.
The Strokes' new album feels like a financial liability, not a creative triumph.
Coachella stickers are a performative identity signal with no real meaning.
Service animals should require visible proof of function and strict enforcement.
Flat omelets are a legitimate culinary aesthetic, not a mistake.
Space exploration is impressive but irrelevant to most people’s daily lives.
…and 3 more takeaways available in PodZeus
The Strokes, Stickers, and Stakes
“It's not looking promising to me. I think the Strokes album feels like somebody owes money to somebody.”
The Rise of the Incel Sound Bar
The hosts debate the necessity of sound bars, with Jason calling them 'incel-y' and a sign of a 'thousand Blu-rays' lifestyle. They discuss their new 55-inch TV setup, Amazon’s delivery service, and the absurdity of home theater aesthetics, all while mocking the over-engineering of modern tech interfaces.
Power Lunches, Omelets, and the Death of Mr. Chow
“It was so good. Love it. And there was a chopped salad that was delicious. It was just a very, very, very good lunch and I was very happy that it worked out.”
Dogs, Disgust, and the Service Animal Scam
“If you're the type of person that abuses the system like, oh I have insomnia so that's why my great Dane has to come on the airplane with me or whatever. I think it's okay to do that but you can't just be some dumb guy on his phone in his aloe sweats acting like he can just do whatever he wants to do.”
The Masters, the Meme, and the Modern Sport
The hosts critique the recent inclusion of comedians and influencers at the Masters golf tournament, calling it a 'bozo convention.' They lament the commercialization of the event, the rise of ironic merchandise, and the erosion of its prestige, comparing it to the 'barstoolification' of elite culture.
“If you're the type of person that abuses the system like, oh I have insomnia so that's why my great Dane has to come on the airplane with me or whatever. I think it's okay to do that but you can't just be some dumb guy on his phone in his aloe sweats acting like he can just do whatever he wants to do.”
“The only human-based economy in the near future will be paying and subscribing and receiving subscription money from our friends.”
“It's not looking promising to me. I think the Strokes album feels like somebody owes money to somebody.”
Hosts
The Strokes
other
Coachella
other
The Masters
other
Sonos
brand
Nav
other
SNL
other
Lorne Michaels
other
Dart Collective
other
The Voids
other
Tucker Carlson
other
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